Messages from Young Adults

Porn: A Women’s Thing

Pornography, friendship and other female things – I didn’t really want to go. In fact, as I walked up the five flights of stairs to the seminar I kept thinking of other seminars I could go to instead. Why? Because going to a seminar on pornography is kind of like going to a therapist – if people see you there, they might assume you have a problem.  But my curiosity got the better of me, and apparently I was not alone. Even the presenter of “The Princess and Pornography” seemed surprised to see so many young women. But she was glad we came, and so was I.

Kudos to the organizers of Live Feed: Ontario Conference’s Young Men and Women’s Conference for recognizing that pornography is not just about dirty old men – but about women too.  The highlight for me was the discussion on the root of pornography and the fact that it is not so much about sex, as it is about the death of the woman. The body of the woman is the focus in most porn, and throughout history we have seen this objectification of the female form by men as a chief cause in the degradation of women.  But this isn’t about male dominance. It’s about how sin has ruined our relationships. Pornography, among other things, is just the end result.   Before sin there was equality between the man and the woman. Genesis 2:25 says they were both naked and they were not ashamed. But after sin there came a shift in the balance, and man came to rule over the woman (Gen 3:16). And while this arrangement can work when governed by Christ, we also know it can be destructive, leaving women hurt, used and abused.

However, what gets less attention is how sin has ruined the relationships among women. Instead of a fellowship of sisterhood, we have relationships of malice and envy that make Rachel and Leah’s feud look like a day at the spa. Think I’m joking? Then tell me why women are so much harder on other women than men? Why do statistics tell us that in the case of rape, women are more likely than men to attribute blame to the female victim? And closer to home, why is a friendship between two women sometimes harder than a friendship between two men?   What is sure though is that a Christ-centred friendship between two women can be a blessing from God. In it can be found the encouragement, empathy, and strength Solomon’s model of friendship describes. (Ecclesiastes 4: 9, 10)  Two are better than one, because they have good reward for their toil. For if they fall one will lift up the other; but woe to one who is alone and falls and does not have another to help. (Ecclesiastes 4: 9, 10)

Sin may have corrupted our relationships, but a genuine friendship based on the love of God is still possible.

Ruth and Naomi did it. Why can’t we?


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Comments

  • mentyola (Author) said:

    i’m first to post a comment and welcome our new writer, Rhonda Bowen

    relationship and sin
    please the effect can not be overstated

    happy sabbath y’all

  • Janice A. Becca (Author) said:

    Rhonda makes a hot entrance on adventistYA.

    We’re so excited to have her join our team! You can see why after reading this wonderfully drafted post. Relevant, authentic, everything – adventistYA!

    Welcome.

  • Neema Okal said:

    Wow, what a great piece, we always have issues among ourselves and we hope each and everyday that we shall overcome.

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